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This how to overcome imposter syndrome post has been a long time coming. Growing up, I was rarely the smartest person in the class but I had a crazy work ethic and did pretty well in school simply from studying like crazy. I graduated salutatorian of my high school class of nearly 600 students and even as I stood up to give my speech at high-school graduation, part of me felt like I didn’t deserve it. I feared people would find out that I wasn’t naturally smart, and that at some point I’d run out of time to be able to “out-study” or “out-work” my peers.
In college, I loved my computer science classes as it was so much fun to design and solve problems on the computer. But you can probably imagine that I was one of a super small handful of girls in every computer science class and truth be told, it seemed like my classes were filled with super smart computer whizzes who had been programming since they first learned the alphabet. I had many days where I felt insecure and unsure, afraid to speak up in class for fear of being judged. I had many days where I felt like I didn’t belong and many days where I considered changing my major.
Over the next few years, I found myself a few close computer science friends (all guys) and graduated as 1 of 4 females in a computer science class of 94. Despite all the efforts to push for females in STEM, it’s shocking to see that only 4% of my computer science class consisted of females. Even on graduation day, I felt like I didn’t necessarily “belong” in the computer science world.
Fast forward to the next few years after college, I worked at an esteemed international technology firm. I worked extra long hours those first few years as I strived to prove myself. I delivered almost all of my projects on time or even ahead of schedule and yet, I found myself getting promoted after other male counterparts who had been on the team for less time with less accomplished work. Looking back I realize now that this was gender bias, but instead it resulted in me doubting myself and added fuel to my feeling of Imposter Syndrome.
How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome
Imposter Syndrome can be described that pervasive feeling of self doubt, insecurity, or fraudulence despite often overwhelming evidence to the contrary. In college and early on in my career, I frequently felt like I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. I pressured myself to work extra hours as I felt like I had to in order to gain the approval of the men on my team.
Over the years and through a few more job changes where I’ve led small teams in each role, I’ve learned to value my voice. Surprisingly enough, becoming a mom played a significant role in helping me learn to trust myself. I realized that I was strong, capable, and needed to stand up for myself more. I learned that by being passive, not speaking up when I was treated unfairly, and being underestimated simply because I was female was actually doing an injustice to all women in my shoes.
I’m also so glad that shortly after having my second child, Mei, that I found a position at a company and a team where I truly felt valued. My efforts were consistently recognized and moreover, I started networking with other women in my field. The funny thing is, the more you speak up for yourself, the more confidence you build.
Top: Lululemon ‘Full Flourish’ Pullover (4 / TTS) – (similar, similar)
Bottom: Amazon Hawthorn Athletic 25″ Leggings (XS / TTS) – super similar to Lululemon Align leggings!
Bottom: Bearpaw ‘Loki’ Slippers (6 / size up if in-between)
Microsoft Surface Pro 7 | faux fiddle leaf fig tree | oversized duvet cover
Reflecting back on the many years of fear and insecurity made me realize that I was in my own way. Trusting in myself and in my abilities, I’ve learned to assert myself. To make my voice heard. And as a mom to two little ones, overcoming Imposter Syndrome is a lesson that I strive to teach by example.
Do you have any extra tips on how to overcome imposter syndrome? Let em know in a comment below!
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Lovely says
You are so brave! Thank you for sharing your experience!
xoxo
Lovely
http://www.mynameislovely.com
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